Self Talk

Notes

Usually, when we are spiraling, or unable to process the situation, it is when we either are not talking to ourselves at all, or we are too close to the situation, we say things like "why i am so stupid? why did i do that?" Self Criticism

In order to break the chatter and have a better Emotional Resilience, we can implement Cognitive Distancing, by looking at the situation from the outside, like a third person view, and actually talk to ourselves in third person, like to a friend positive language. Similarly, we can use temporal distancing, meaning looking at the situation from a "future me" point of view, what meaning or effects would these events have on my five years later? Zoom out This can give us three benefits: 1., Perspective - we can judge better the Context and implications of the situation, gather new viewpoint on the situation that might be healthier and more helpful. 2. Wisdom - we give better advices to our friends than to ourselves. By looking at the situation from the outside, we might gain insights on how to solve the situation or what to learn from it. 3. New narratives - find a new "overarching logic" that guides us in our life, makes sense of the events and the connection between the outside world and our identity. Narratives 4. Compassion - since we are more likely to be compassionate towards others than to ourselves when we fail, talking to ourselves in third person is likely to increase Self-compassion

These aspects combined allow us to undergo a moment of Identity Discovery in a healthy way without spiraling into an existential or identity crisis.

Visual

Overview

🔼Topic:: behavioral psychology (MOC) Origin:: Chatter (book) 🔗Link::