Stillness Is Key
🔗Connect
🔼Topic:: Mindset (MOC)
✒️ Note-Making
💡Clarify
🔈 Summary of main ideas
- Stillness is freedom - If we let ourselves get overwhelmed by outside noise or internal conflicts, we are becoming a slave to others instead of living and acting as we wished. To be able to be still despite a storm outside is the way to achieve inner piece and a life worth living.
- Clear your mind - The mind is what translates our wishes into actions. In order for this transition to be accurate, we need to make sure we feed it the right inputs and conditions. That includes slowing down to not rush important decisions, to block out noise, to increase our knowledge, and to let go of fears about the future or regrets about the past.
- Purify your soul - The soul is what provides us with a direction, a purpose in life. To make sure we are on the right path, we need to cultivate our virtues, strengthen our connection to others, to accept out flaws and embrace who we are, to keep desire and anger in check.
- Conserve your energy - The body is what fuels our life, without it we won't be able to function. To keep our energies high, we should limit what we commit to, keep a minimalistic life, maintain good sleep, moving and eating habits, have a hobby just for fun, and don't fall into temptations.
🗒️Relate
⛓ Life lessons, action items
🔍Critique
✅ by following this method, what will happen? Balanced good life - to live a good life we must stay strong against the forces that try to overwhelm us, by practicing stillness we could focus on what matters, act in accordance with our values, and keep ourselves active in the long term
❌ the logical jumps, holes or simply cases where it is wrong...
🧱 Implementations and limitations of it are...
🗨️Review
💭 my opinions on the book, the writers style... Compared to his other books, this was a bit less motivational and also less informative. Perhaps stillness is by nature a mature that is harder to motivate others to do or to see compared to obstacles and ego that are much more "in our faces."
The separation between mind, body and soul sounds good but the actual topics are very forced and vague. Why does owning less stuff is a body issue, and beware desire is a soul thing while avoid ego is a mind thing? Seems like an attempt to make it seem as more content than what it is.
🖼️Outline
📒 Notes
Preface
Stillness, the ability to quiet out the external noise and focus only on the voices which matter, to act with calmness despite stress, this is a skill we all would like to develop
- To be steady while the world spins around you. To act without frenzy. To hear only what needs to be heard. To possess quietude—exterior and interior—on command. (Location 134)
Introduction
Stillness is not only a way to quiet the mind, but also to slow down time Slowing down. To think before acting, which is even harder in modern time when we are overstimulated attention economy, stressed and expected to act fast otherwise we will miss out life FOMO hustle culture. Stillness is not a "nice to have", it's key to any success and wellbeing in life that we want to have. Only by seeing things clearly, we can act with effectiveness towards the right things objectivism mindfulness.
To achieve stillness, we need to focus on three main areas:
- Mind
- Body
- Soul
- Stillness is what aims the archer’s arrow. It inspires new ideas. It sharpens perspective and illuminates connections. It slows the ball down so that we might hit it. It generates a vision, helps us resist the passions of the mob, makes space for gratitude and wonder. Stillness allows us to persevere. To succeed. (Location 159)
- To achieve stillness, we’ll need to focus on three domains, the timeless trinity of mind, body, soul—the head, the heart, the flesh. (Location 230)
Part 1 - Mind
The Domain of the Mind
We can't allow ourselves to stick with our Gut Feeling, most of the time our initial impulse is mistaken first batch trash.
We first have to stop, try to understand the other side active listening, the situation in a clear way before we jump to conclusions. We have to rethink, and don't give in to our emotions.
- Our job is not to “go with our gut” or fixate on the first impression we form about an issue. No, we need to be strong enough to resist thinking that is too neat, too plausible, and therefore almost always wrong. (Location 276)
- Keep strong, if possible. In any case, keep cool. Have unlimited patience. Never corner an opponent, and always assist him to save face. Put yourself in his shoes—so as to see things through his eyes. Avoid self-righteousness like the devil—nothing is so self-blinding. (Location 287)
- We must cultivate mental stillness to succeed in life and to successfully navigate the many crises it throws our way. It will not be easy. But it is essential. (Location 373)
Become Present
In our minds we often wander, either regrets about the past, or thoughts about the future. When we are not present, we miss out on the opportunities of life. Love, success, happiness, all exist only in the present, and we get lost in our minds we will never experience it. It's hard to focus on the now, Distractions are often very tempting, but it is key for taking control over our lives.
- Being present demands all of us. It’s not nothing. It may be the hardest thing in the world. (Location 416)
- The less energy we waste regretting the past or worrying about the future, the more energy we will have for what’s in front of us. (Location 446)
- Make what you can of what you have been given. Live what can be lived. That’s what excellence is. That’s what presence makes possible. (Location 453)
Limit Your Inputs
We are surrounded by noise, which makes it harder to implement Prioritization, i.e to separate the important from the unimportant, because we are too focused on the false sense of urgency this constant stream of information is causing us. If we have no filters on the amount and quality of information going in, don't be surprised if you make bad decision GIGO
We should be better at distilling information, and the easiest way is to limit our inputs, to consume less information, to be harder to reach, and wee which information prevails, this is usually the important one. Use tools such as the Eisenhower matrix to separate the important from the urgent.
Empty Your Mind
When our brain is overwhelmed with thoughts, there are no resources left for it to function, it focuses on the thoughts rather than the action. By clearing our minds Blank Space we free ourselves to be the best we can be.
- Whatever you face, whatever you’re doing will require, first and foremost, that you don’t defeat yourself. That you don’t make it harder by overthinking, by needless doubts, or by second-guessing. (Location 625)
Slow Down, Think Deeply
Our most creative thoughts, the most valuable information is often hidden, especially from quick shallow thinking. Otherwise everyone would have noticed it by now. Don't fall into the temptation of the streetlight effect, stop and slowly and carefully analyze the situation, the hidden components waiting to be found.
- To see what matters, you really have to look. To understand it, you have to really think. It takes real work to grasp what is invisible to just about everyone else. (Location 679)
Start Journaling
journaling is a good method for introspection, to explore the depths within you, to ask and answer the tough questions like what bothers me, how can I become a better person, which hard choices I'm avoiding, what am I grateful for. It doesn't matter how you journal, as long as you do it regularly.
- Journaling is a way to ask tough questions: Where am I standing in my own way? What’s the smallest step I can take toward a big thing today? Why am I so worked up about this? What blessings can I count right now? Why do I care so much about impressing people? What is the harder choice I’m avoiding? Do I rule my fears, or do they rule me? How will today’s difficulties reveal my character? (Location 747)
Cultivating Silence
Silence is underrated, since we are so surrounded by noise, we often forget to appreciate the benefits of silence, to be alone with our thoughts solitude
Seek Wisdom
To seek wisdom is to avoid Conformation Bias, to seek knowledge and have humility while doing it. Never let go of doubt, remember that you might be wrong, yet try to gain as much knowledge and experience as possible to overcome it.
- wisdom is a sense of the big picture, the accumulation of experience and the ability to rise above the biases, (Location 855)
Find Confidence, Avoid Ego
Avoid over confidence at all costs, but don't fall into imposter syndrome either. Have Self Worth to trust your knowledge and skills, to decide who and what to listen to, while not trying to prove yourself to anyone.
- Confident people know what matters. They know when to ignore other people’s opinions. They don’t boast or lie to get ahead (and then struggle to deliver). Confidence is the freedom to set your own standards and unshackle yourself from the need to prove yourself. (Location 941)
Let Go
If we focus too much on our goals, we will fail the law of reverse effect, we have to trust the process and remained focus on our performance rather than what we are trying to achieve.
Spirit
The Domain of the Spirit
We can't accept others if we don't accept ourselves, we can't live in harmony with the world if we are at war with ourselves harmonious self. To live well requires a good soul. One that steer clear of negative emotions, that has a strong moral compass, that accept that life is not an endless pursuit after more and more, but rather accepting what we have, and find happiness in it, that cultivate kindness to itself and others.
- We are incapable of seeing what is essential in the world if we are blind to what’s going on within us. We cannot be in harmony with anyone or anything if the need for more, more, more is gnawing at our insides like a maggot. (Location 1167)
- CHOOSE VIRTUE (Location 1205)
- Life is meaningless to the person who decides their choices have no meaning. (Location 1222)
Choose virtue
Living virtuously is the same as having a good life. To be virtuous - kind, moderate, courageous, honest and humble are the traits that will bring you happiness. If you surround yourself with lies, with lust for wealth and fame, if you treat others as tools, you will reap what you sow. We need to stop and ask ourselves what do we stand for, and in the moments that matter most, remain ourselves of our values virtue theory
Heal the Inner Child
Many of our emotional baggage comes from our childhood, our inner child that still hurts, still takes control of our emotions. By embracing our feelings, by filling ourselves with self love Self-compassion we might be able to heal.
- It will take patience and empathy and real self-love to heal the wounds in your life. (Location 1338)
Beware Desire
desire Can lead us astray, as with any feeling it can be fleeting and doesn't have to have control over us, and surely not define us. By taking a pause to notice the feeling when it happens we can see it for what it really is, much smaller than the power we once gave it
- Only those of us who take the time to explore, to question, to extrapolate the consequences of our desires have an opportunity to overcome them and to stop regrets before they start. Only they know that real pleasure lies in having a soul that’s true and stable, happy and secure. (Location 1434)
Enough
If you believe in the "I'll be happy when" then you are going to be disappointed Future disillusionment. Wanting more and more is an endless bucket negative cycle. True power is from knowing when it's enough, when it's time to enjoy what we have earned, what we already have. Happiness is never the result of having more things, it's the choice that we can be happy with where we are happiness is an internal state.
- There is no stillness for the person who cannot appreciate things as they are, particularly when that person has objectively done so much. The creep of more, more, more is like a hydra. Satisfy one—lop it off the bucket list—and two more grow in its place. (Location 1466)
- You will never feel okay by way of external accomplishments. Enough comes from the inside. It comes from stepping off the train. From seeing what you already have, what you’ve always had. (Location 1500)
Bath in Beauty
There is beauty all around us, we just need to notice it, to let it cleanse us. It doesn't have to be something as grandiose as going on a hike, sometimes even just watching a person sitting on a bench is awe inspiring enough.
- Not that all beauty is so immediately beautiful. We’re not always on the farm or at the beach or gazing out over sweeping canyon views. Which is why the philosopher must cultivate the poet’s eye—the ability to see beauty everywhere, even in the banal or the terrible. (Location 1558)
Accept a Higher Power
Faith has a strong effect on our wellbeing. By acknowledging a higher power it is easier for us to accept that not everything is in our control, that we are not alone and are a part of something bigger. This leap into faith is not necessarily believing in god, it could even be believing in the "logos" or nature that connects us all.
Enter Relationships
We are not meant to be alone Human is a social being, for our happiness, our success, our sanity, we need relationships in our lives. To keep us honest, on the right track, and share our feelings with Happiness is shared.
- Stillness is best not sought alone. And, like success, it is best when shared. (Location 1741)
Conquer Your Anger
anger is a problematic emotion. It has a tendency of hurting us more than others, of self sabotage and many moments of Regret. The only advantage of anger is that it works as a fuel, but we can find a different source of energy. By replacing anger with love, gratitude, kindness, we maintain high levels of energy while keeping ourselves calm and collected Emotional Aikido for some reason I thought of cold fusion instead of nuclear fusion in this case
- Anger is counterproductive. The flash of rage here, an outburst at the incompetence around us there—this may generate a moment of raw motivation or even a feeling of relief, but we rarely tally up the frustration they cause down the road. Even if we apologize or the good we do outweighs the harm, damage remains—and consequences follow. (Location 1843)
- we must choose to drive out anger and replace it with love and gratitude—and purpose. Our stillness depends on our ability to slow down and choose not to be angry, to run on different fuel. Fuel that helps us win and build, and doesn’t hurt other people, our cause, or our chance at peace. (Location 1869)
All is One
We are never alone, in sadness and in joy, we always have others to turn to. Even complete strangers share this sense of humanity with us, and when we take a pause and get some distance, we can see that we are all one, connected by biology, by pursuit of peace and love, by forces that drives us towards one another. Unity
- To understand all is to forgive all. To love all is to be at peace with all, including yourself. (Location 1903)
Body
The Domain of the Body
We are not thoughts floating through the air, we are psychical beings, and this means that we are bound by it's limit. To have a body means that everything is about energy management. If we push ourselves too hard, if we neglect our body, all of our efforts will be blocked or useless burnout. We should be mindful of our limited energy, notice how can we preserve and generate more, and which activities are worth the investments scarcity
- the body keeps score. If we don’t take care of ourselves physically, if we don’t align ourselves properly, it doesn’t matter how strong we are mentally or spiritually. (Location 2159)
Say no
Society glorifies action, but it is inaction that can be just as efficient if not more. If we say yes to everything, we miss focusing and dedicating the necessary time for each one because Multitasking doesnt exist, saying yes to everything is like saying no to what matters because we lack prioritizing. saying no allows us to save pieces of our life, our attention, ourselves for what truly matters.
Also by saying yes to everything might rush things before their time, not letting our effort bear fruits but rather decay too early life as flow.
Talk a Walk
nature walk is good for mindfulness and creativity
- In an attempt to unlock a deeper part of our consciousness and access a high level of our mind, we would do well to get our body moving and our blood flowing. (Location 2309)
Build a Routine
To have a routine is a way to quiet the body, to instill order around you to match the order in your mind, to help mitigate the bad feeling when luck is not on your side. Rituals.
Get Rid of Your Stuff
We have to be sure our stuff don't own us instead. The more we accumulate, the more are we bound by it. More stuff demands a bigger house, more upkeep, and the more our happiness becomes dependent on those things, which makes it even more crushing when we lose them attachment. The key for independence is Minimalism, to be free is to need fewer things.
- mental and spiritual independence matter little if the things we own in the physical world end up owning us. (Location 2418)
Seek Solitude
We are overwhelmed with noise, it disrupts our ability to think, that's why we need moments of solitude once in a while to refocus and clear our mind.
Be a Human Being
If we try to have it all, in the best case scenario we will experience burnout. In the worst case, we will kill ourselves from stress and exhaustion. We need Moderation in our lives, to pace our work while we also take care of ourselves
Go to Sleep
sleep is one of the most important things we can do to maintain our health and our productivity, it's far from a luxury.
- People say, “I’ll sleep when I’m dead,” as they hasten that very death, both literally and figuratively. They trade their health for a few more working hours. (Location 2668)
- FIND A HOBBY (Location 2706)
- Leisure is not the absence of activity, it is activity. What is absent is any external justification—you can’t do leisure for pay, you can’t do it to impress people. You have to do it for you. (Location 2749)
- The point isn’t to simply fill the hours or distract the mind. Rather, it’s to engage a pursuit that simultaneously challenges and relaxes us. (Location 2762)
Find a Hobby
A hobby refreshes the soul and body. It is something we do out of passion, not out of necessity. It's not work, it's not pay, it's not a habit, it's fun. It's something we can have a sense of flow in it. It can be literally anything.
Beware Escapism
Not only that we can't outrun despair, just the attempt is counterproductive. escapism quickly becomes addiction that only makes the problem worse. We can't escape our life, we can only solve it by making better decisions, by understanding ourselves, by building a life we won't want to escape from.
- you can’t flee despair. You can’t escape, with your body, problems that exist in your mind and soul. You can’t run away from your choices—you can only fix them with better choices. (Location 2813)
- What you seek will come only if you sit and do the work, if you probe yourself with real self-awareness and patience. (Location 2834)
- Build a life that you don’t need to escape from. (Location 2849)
Act Bravely
To be well requires us to do well. We won't feel good about ourselves unless we are true to our virtues to be moral is to act moral. It takes courage to follow our beliefs, but otherwise we will be miserable and full of regret. Death comes to us all, we should worry less on when it will come and focus more on being satisfied with the life we've lived by then.
- A person who makes selfish choices or acts contrary to their conscience will never be at peace. (Location 2887)